More Canadian Humour... - Pace and Cap

Ted Craven · 07-23-2008, 05:24 PM

I was having a tough day, until I received this from my sweetie

Turbulator · 07-24-2008, 02:08 AM

Very funny, Ted.

On a more serious note I got into a car accident last night. I rear-ended a guy and it was totally my fault. We got out of our cars, and he was really pissed, but I started chuckling because the guy was literally about three or four feet tall--a dwarf.

He looked up at me and said, "I'm not happy!"

I looked down at him and said, "Well, then which one are you?"

Bill V. · 07-24-2008, 06:38 AM

LOL

A. Why are you so mad?
C. I was wrongly accused of stealing $14.00
A. Wow thats tough What did you do?
C. I was so mad I ran away
A. Why did you come back?
C. How far can you get on $14.00?

sorry Joe You tell it much better
Bill

Bill Lyster · 07-24-2008, 12:52 PM

Siamese twins walk into a pub in Toronto and park themselves on a bar stool.
One of them says to the landlord, "Don't mind us, we're joined at the hip.
I'm John, he's Jim. Two Molson Canadian beers please".
The landlord, feeling slightly awkward, tries to make polite conversation

while pouring the beers. "Been on holiday yet, lads?"
"Off to England next month," says John. "We go to England every year and hire a car and drive for miles, don't we, Jim?" Jim agrees.
"Ah, England!" says the landlord. "Wonderful country... the history, the beer, the culture..."
"Nah, we don't like that British crap," says John. "Hamburgers & Molson's

beer, that's us, eh Jim? And we can't stand the English - they're so arrogant and rude."
"So why keep going to England?" asks the landlord.
"It's the only chance Jim gets to drive."

Rverge · 07-24-2008, 04:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Turbulator

Very funny, Ted.

On a more serious note I got into a car accident last night. I rear-ended a guy and it was totally my fault. We got out of our cars, and he was really pissed, but I started chuckling because the guy was literally about three or four feet tall--a dwarf.

He looked up at me and said, "I'm not happy!"

I looked down at him and said, "Well, then which one are you?"

lol lol

azbacks · 07-24-2008, 04:48 PM

Very Funny gentlemen....

Sorry about the accident Turbulator, but great comeback!!!!

Pun from my bro-in-law.....

A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintings from the Louvre.

After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings and made it safely to his van.

However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas.

When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error,
he replied, "Monsieur, that is very the reason I stole the paintings...I had no Monet to buy Degas
to make the Van Gogh."

And you thought I didn't have De Gaulle to send this on to you.

Well, I figured I had nothing Toulouse.

07-23-2008, 05:24 PM	#1
Ted Craven Grade 1 Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Nanaimo, British Columbia, Canada Posts: 8,854	More Canadian Humour... I was having a tough day, until I received this from my sweetie __________________ RDSS - Racing Decision Support System™

07-24-2008, 02:08 AM	#2
Turbulator Grade 1 Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 467	Car Accident Very funny, Ted. On a more serious note I got into a car accident last night. I rear-ended a guy and it was totally my fault. We got out of our cars, and he was really pissed, but I started chuckling because the guy was literally about three or four feet tall--a dwarf. He looked up at me and said, "I'm not happy!" I looked down at him and said, "Well, then which one are you?"

07-24-2008, 06:38 AM	#3
Bill V. The egg man Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Carlsbad, California Posts: 10,005	mad LOL A. Why are you so mad? C. I was wrongly accused of stealing $14.00 A. Wow thats tough What did you do? C. I was so mad I ran away A. Why did you come back? C. How far can you get on $14.00? sorry Joe You tell it much better Bill

07-24-2008, 04:48 PM	#6
azbacks Grade 1 Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: Arizona Posts: 226	Very Funny gentlemen.... Sorry about the accident Turbulator, but great comeback!!!! Pun from my bro-in-law..... A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintings from the Louvre. After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings and made it safely to his van. However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied, "Monsieur, that is very the reason I stole the paintings...I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh." And you thought I didn't have De Gaulle to send this on to you. Well, I figured I had nothing Toulouse. __________________ There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you. -- Will Rogers (1879-1935)

07-24-2008, 12:52 PM	#4
Bill Lyster Grade 1 Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Escondido CA just 25 minutes from where the turf meets the surf - "...at Del Mar" Posts: 2,418	Siamese twins walk into a pub in Toronto and park themselves on a bar stool. One of them says to the landlord, "Don't mind us, we're joined at the hip. I'm John, he's Jim. Two Molson Canadian beers please". The landlord, feeling slightly awkward, tries to make polite conversation while pouring the beers. "Been on holiday yet, lads?" "Off to England next month," says John. "We go to England every year and hire a car and drive for miles, don't we, Jim?" Jim agrees. "Ah, England!" says the landlord. "Wonderful country... the history, the beer, the culture..." "Nah, we don't like that British crap," says John. "Hamburgers & Molson's beer, that's us, eh Jim? And we can't stand the English - they're so arrogant and rude." "So why keep going to England?" asks the landlord. "It's the only chance Jim gets to drive."